Horatio and Manon

[sanne]

Great so far. And though I can imagine his reaction, I still would bid on him...@helene, it's a great idea for our DDD......any news about that BTW?

Sanne

[katpin31791]

I love it. Thanks. Can't wait to read more

Sharon

[Horatio Caine]

I can only smile ;D and smile ;D and smile ;D

Manon

[lucymalta]

horatiocaine said:

I can only smile ;D and smile ;D and smile ;D

Manon

Yeah I bet.....

Lucy

[iluvcsi]

....grind him up and spread H on crackers?

;D H as mid-night snack....what I always wanted

Chris

second part....looooove it ;D Thanks Neteret

[lucymalta]

Mid - night snack.... C'mon Chris - you can do better than that.... An all-night snack for me....

Lucy

[Neteret]

Part 3

“Well, sweetie, if you can’t smile, can you at least look like you’re not coming in for dental surgery?” Loretta’s tired drawl hopefully inquired from her seat at the end of the raised thirty-foot runway.

Glad he’d brought an extra dress shirt, Horatio felt rumpled already and the d**n affair hadn’t even started yet! He was aghast at what was being expected of him and, apparently, it showed.

“I mean, you look gorgeous, my dear, but just a bit intimidating, you know.” The words came out of the seasoned organizer’s mouth with the ease of several years’ practice. She’d been part of more benefit galas than she could remember. The odd thing was, what she used to do for the girls at debutante balls and various beauty pageants was exactly the same as she was doing now, just a great deal more fun.

As if coming to a decision she rose and bounced her ample form up the makeshift steps to stand beside him. Looking up into his eyes, she nodded in sympathy. “Lieutenant, I can see that you’d rather be wrestling an angry alligator into a tight corner right now. I know you were shanghaied into this. I won’t tell you what I think of the decision to choose participants for this affair without as much as a by your leave. I really tried everything in my power to make this more comfortable for you tonight.” She waved a hand, knowing he didn’t care a fig for her troubles. “What I’m trying to get across here is that we’re both stuck under powers that we can’t fight, so I’d like to see if we can at least find some way to survive the event with some of our dignity in tact.”

Dropping his head, his chin feeling the button in the aquamarine shawl tie at his neck, Horatio smiled as he examined the forefinger of his left hand. “You mean drop the attitude?” he asked quietly.

Loretta felt a strong hand rescue her from falling off the runway as she shot her head back to let out a raucous whoop of laughter. “Lordy, no! And that’s it, exactly! Please, keep the ‘tude; just try to channel it away from thoughts of murder. That's all I’m asking.”

At the handsome redhead’s raised eyebrows, she continued, “You’re going up for bid from women who mostly like the idea of a ‘bad boy’, but not one who looks like he might actually carry it out to the ultimate end. What we have tonight is mostly bored, got-nothing-better-to-do-but-spend-money-for-good causes, I’m-here-to-look-pretty, I’m-here-to-have-fun, pampered darlings. They love attitude, just not what it might actually mean.”

At his frown, the seventy-something woman put a smooth, well manicured hand on arm of the navy blue tuxedo. “And I lost you at ‘going up for bid’, didn’t I? I’m sure that you have far better things to do than feel like a fool in front of foolish women. However, you came in spite of that. I have a gut feeling you’re here because one, you were not given a choice, but primarily because, even if you only raise five dollars, every penny of it goes to a dead police officer’s family. Right?” She lowered her chin a bit and looked up through her brown-penciled brows. She was pretty sure she’d nailed where this one’s value lay. Watching her victim’s mouth pooch out a bit, she continued with as much forced gaiety as she could manage. “So, go back to where you came out through the curtains, and walk out here, and stand with the thought of honoring those men and their families.” Her voice dropped to a whisper, “Forget the rest of it.”

Three hours later, Horatio repeated his rehearsed movements. Allowed to sit in a corner, away from the backstage hubbub until just before he went out, he’d actually succeeded in dozing for a moment. Then he was led to his entry position behind the luxurious damask curtains, heard his name announced, and strode out. Loretta had told him to ‘look for each and every fallen officer he knew of, as if to expect to find them sitting in the front row seats along the runway’. She’d known that with the lights in his eyes from above and below, he wouldn’t be able to see the real audience.

“Then, after you’ve reached the end here, you forget you’re wearing that gorgeous tux—where did you get that, anyway? It does wonders for you!—anyway, you just think that you are identifying your officer status to someone-or-other and swing that jacket back as if you’ve got your badge on your belt.” He did as he was told. “Perfect! Now you just hold that look and in two minutes, it’ll be over! Soon as you hear ‘sold’ you walk down the stairs here and you’ll be escorted over to whoever got you.”

What he hadn’t really heard while standing in back of the gold and brown drapes was how he was announced. The M.C., a well known gossip mavin from the local radio talk shows, had no idea who Horatio was and cared less, but had been instructed to make as much of each man as she could devise and that this one was the grand finale. The orders were, 'Pull out all the stops for this last one’, Jill, and so she did

“And now, ladies, the one you’ve been waiting for all evening. I’ve heard it personally from him, that he will match every dollar you bid, in personal services to you. He says he aims to make the winner of this date, the happiest woman in Miami, but only if you make it worth the effort. So, which of you am I going to get to glam about for the next few days for winning the hottest policeman in Miami? And now, here he is, the fabulous, the gorgeous, the, as I have heard from many, the most edible, Lieutenant Horatio Caine!”

Instead of standing for two minutes, the bidding went on and on. He didn’t even hear the final bid, he was just glad to step out of the spotlight when it was over.

TBC

[Lian]

I really am LMFAO...this is so funny...I can see him standing in the spotlights...that really is so NOT "H" like...I love this story... ;D

Lian

[Horatio Caine]

No lol, that's true, absolutely not H at all, but hey..... I can only smile ;D

Manon

[jstyle]

Lol, great story!

Jessica

[sanne]

Did I make the final bid, did I, did I......please say I did.....

Great story neteret..can't wait to read more

Sanne

[helene68]

Every chapter is getting funnier.
thanks Net for making me laugh. I'm sitting outside with my laptop and the neighbors must be wondering by now what it is that makes me laugh so loud.

@ Sanne; we will be searching in Den Bosch for a location next week. Will e-mail you and the others after that.

Hélène

[sanne]

Thnx Helene, maybe I C U on MSN later today or this week. Oh, and as for your neighbours: don't they know you by now??

Sanne

[emschld]

OK let's see where this takes our very unhappy lt. Caine. He can face done the bad guys with no problem, but face down a woman who has just pd $$$$ for a fun night with him I think he may just meet his match. Those women are just down right mean when they don't get what they want.

Regina

[Neteret]

For every shock, there's an aftershock, right?

Part 4

“Good mornin’, sunshine! Manon says she wants to talk to you about last night.”

Stepping out of the elevator, Horatio tilted his head inquiring, “Excuse me?” With the horror over, and now, feeling free to think of the variety of caseloads for the day, Calleigh’s remark took the CSI lieutenant by surprise.

Uncharacteristically, Calleigh looked flustered. She put a hand out to him. “Oh, Horatio, was she not supposed to say anything? I mean, it was on this morning’s radio and TV gossip news! It’s not like it’s just among us anymore.”

Since her boss’ pose didn’t change she drawled on, “I mean, I was as surprised as anyone that she’d be a guest at such an event, much less even be able to participate. I haven’t had much chance to get to know her yet so when I heard her name announced as paying the highest price in the event’s history for you, well, I nearly spit out my toothbrush!”

A sick realization that last night’s horror wasn’t over, slammed home; he still had to ‘go on a date’ with his purchaser. After he’d heard the word ‘Sold’ blaring from the darkness past the spotlights on him, he’d been covered in a roar of applause and screaming shouts, both of triumph and disappointment. From just beyond the row of lights on the runway’s edge, he saw a feminine arm extend to him and hoped it was the ‘escort’ who would lead him away from this torment. Trying not to look as shell-shocked as he felt, he barely avoided stumbling down the narrow steps to the floor below.

Led past the throng of shapely hips and perfectly shaped breasts barely covered in designer gowns, he was brought to a table. Although the lights had been brightened, the experience had still dulled his vision so he didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to who his ‘date’ was. The thought that he’d seen the finely sculpted features under the spangle-pinned blond ‘do’ from somewhere crossed his mind briefly and then fled. He’d barely remembered handing over the envelope containing the receipt of his purchase and a few particulars like his cell number. After posing with the vaguely familiar young woman in the flurry of photographic flashes, he had finally made his excuses about work and departed without even speaking to his new ‘owner’.

Calleigh blithely continued, “And I thought none of us were to be there. How is it the new kid on the block got to go?” She was referring to the tacit understanding among the team that they were to ignore the event, that the less they acknowledged Horatio’s humiliation, the easier it would be for all concerned.

Suddenly Horatio remembered why the woman from last night seemed familiar. She was the latest addition to the lab staff, hired only two weeks previously. A graduate from Carnegie Mellon University with a degree in forensic chemical analysis, she’d worked a year on patrol in uniform before applying to the lab. He hadn't had a chance to work with her very much, yet. She’d seemed like decent kid in the interview and had nothing to indicate any personal interest in Horatio. How in the world could she have come up with the money for the benefit bidding? What had personnel missed in her psychological profile? Could life get any more complicated?

“Horatio?” Calleigh looked worried. “Do I need to go do damage control? I could probably tell her to just cool her jets for a while, remind her she is at work, and all that.” His assistant team leader knew how to manage people.

Horatio smiled wanly, lowering his gaze in thought. “Um, no. It’s alright, Calleigh, thank you. Uh, what have you got on that mini-mall case?” He started his own damage control process by deflecting Calleigh’s concern as well as getting the day started on the right foot.

Happy to see her relief at not having to deal with the delicate situation, Horatio opened the folder she handed to him. He glanced over the list of evidence she’d been collecting. By the time the two parted ways, he had instructed Calleigh on what still needed to be done for unequivocally nailing her suspects to the legal cross. After her assurance that she’d get it done by the end of the day, he headed off to deal with this Manon.

TBC